Stress is about choices.
Being stressed is a choice that we have the power to make and the power to change at anytime. Though most people express their stress in absolutes (my life is stressful, my job is stressful, etc.), the truth is that a job is just a job, a situation is just a situation and a relationship is...well, you get the picture. None of them carry any specific feeling on their own.
 We actually choose which emotions to assign to events, and it is these choices that determine whether the events are positive or negative:
In John’s work, he is bombarded with projects and frequently pulled into arguments with coworkers. At the end of most days, he feels great and leaves work smiling; he thrives, overcomes and gets himself promoted. Rick, is thrown into the same environment and crumbles. He avoids interacting with colleagues, hates his job and doesn’t last long.
Though we don’t realize it most of the time, the way we feel in any given situation is a choice… often an automatic one.
The key to stressing less is simply a matter of NOTICING a stress reaction and MAKING a different choice. This is as easy (or as difficult) as changing perspective (depending on your perspective). The more often a stress-choice is noticed, the less automatic it becomes. Any internal choice is subject to alteration or adaptation—a fact that never changes.
IF YOU NOTICE YOURSELF GETTING STRESSED:
Immediately give yourself a mental or even physical pat on the back, just for being aware. This will encourage awareness.
Then, take a deep, long breath in and release it slowly—regardless of the situation. This will give you a moment to recap mentally, and stimulate a more relaxed physical state.
Most people do not distinguish between their reactions and the events (or objects) that trigger them. It is important to remember that stress exists nowhere outside the person who is “stressing”—we are the source and master of our stress.
As the creator and bearer of the stress, you have choices. Recognize them.
You can choose to be stressed, to share the stress, or simply to release it: you could avoid or dive into the situation that triggered the response. There are no RIGHT or WRONG choices—only choices that are best for you.
Few people are at their best when negatively stressed. Encourage a relaxation response in the body and the mind, so that you may function at your clearest.
Remember—you are a person, not a robot: you can decide how you want to feel at any time, in any situation. Enjoy your power and your day! |
